Dear Annie: My 90-year-old father has been married to his third wife, who is 85, for nearly 33 years. Between them, they have five adult children: two are his and three are hers. For their entire marriage, they have relied largely on my father's retirement account to pay their day-to-day living expenses. His wife does not have a retirement account of her own. They also have two homes. One is a summer cottage that was in her family before they married. The other is a winter home they purchased to

Dear Annie: My 15-year-old daughter and I used to be extremely close. She was the kind of child who would climb into the car after school and tell me everything before I even pulled out of the parking lot: who sat with whom at lunch, what her teacher said, which friend was mad at which friend and what song everyone was listening to that week. Now, I feel like I am living with a very fashionable attorney who cross-examines everything I say. If I ask how school was, she says, "Fine," in a tone tha

Dear Annie: My sister moved in with our parents in the family home. After my mother sadly passed away, my father and sister continued living there together. Over time, my sister seemed to take over the running of the household. She even had the telephone disconnected, and there were other decisions made that left me feeling increasingly shut out. My sister and I have never been close. Her life was often a burden on my mother, but my mother always stayed loyal to her and protected her. Later, whe

Dear Annie: My husband and I took in five siblings after both of their parents died, even though we were already raising a large family of our own. Overnight, our lives changed. The children were 7, 9, 12, 13 and 15 when they came to us, and we did our best to give them safety, stability and love. We showed up for school events, sports, camps and counseling, though one child's severe behavioral struggles made daily life especially difficult. Now they are adults, and four of them have cut ties wi

Dear Annie: I'm in a dilemma. I've had a friend for 45 years, and I've just realized how selfish he is. It's a one-way street with him. He won't call me or make the effort to visit. I have, in the past, introduced him to friends of mine -- some he's even gone on holiday with -- but he's never returned the favor. He hasn't introduced me to his friends, nor has he asked me to accompany him on trips to see our mutual friend when I could've gone. He's the last one to buy a round of drinks, if he buy

Dear Annie: My husband and I are raising a surprise baby at a stage in life when we thought our child-rearing years were mostly behind us. Our older children are already teenagers and young adults, and while we adore this little one, I would be lying if I said the large age gap has not brought some unexpected emotions with it. On one hand, this baby is deeply loved and has brought joy to our whole family. On the other, I sometimes worry that he will grow up feeling more like an only child than p

Dear Annie: I was really excited when I landed my dream job a few months ago. It has great pay and a title that can really take me places. But now, just a few months in, I'm pulling my hair out. We're in our "busy season," which means lots of late nights and working weekends. Every time I finish one assignment, two more pop up. My problem isn't the hours -- I know busy season will end -- it's that I cannot sleep. For the past week, I've been lucky to get three or four hours a night. When my head

Dear Annie: My wife and I both grew up in the Midwest. We traveled some after retirement and found a wonderful senior community in a much warmer climate state. We finally decided to move to that location to spend the winters. We were always worried about falling on the ice and snow at our Midwest location. After a few years of being gone for the winter, we decided to make that place our permanent home. At first, our kids were very supportive and helped us move. They and our grandkids kept in tou

Dear Annie: From the outside, my life looks steady and full. I have a thoughtful husband, grown children who stay in close touch, dear friends and work that gives my days purpose. I know I am fortunate, which only makes it harder to admit how much I am struggling in private. For years, I have carried pain from things that happened to me when I was young. I have done counseling and truly tried to make peace with the past. In many ways, I have built a happy life. But when stress creeps in, or I fe

Dear Annie: My wife and her sister have always had a close but delicate relationship. They can talk for hours, laugh about old family stories and check in on each other several times a week. But every so often, something shifts, and my sister-in-law becomes sharp, angry and deeply hurtful toward my wife. The source of it almost always goes back to her divorce. Even though the marriage ended 15 years ago, she still carries enormous bitterness toward her ex-husband and blames him entirely for the

Dear Annie: I have been married for 12 years to a good man whom I love very much, but I dread nearly every holiday, birthday dinner and casual Sunday visit with his family. On the surface, my in-laws are charming, polished and the sort of people everyone else describes as "so nice." But behind that polished exterior is a steady drip of cutting remarks aimed almost entirely at me. My mother-in-law has a talent for delivering insults with a smile. She will look at a meal I brought and say, "Well,

Dear Annie: My husband retired eight months ago, and ever since then, our home has felt less like a place to relax and more like a company he has decided to manage. After years of leaving early, coming home late and barely noticing whether the bath towels matched, he is suddenly very interested in how everything is done and has strong opinions about all of it. He has started announcing new "house rules" as though he is issuing office memos. Shoes may no longer be left by the door. The dishwasher

Dear Annie: My spouse and I chose to raise our kids in a neighborhood with excellent schools and a strong sense of community. The downside is that it's also a very affluent area, and many of the families around us are far wealthier than we are. We work hard and live comfortably enough, but we can't provide the kinds of luxuries that some of our children's friends take for granted -- brand-name clothes, international vacations, new cars at 16 and the latest electronics. Lately, our kids have star

Dear Annie: A friend of mine is facing a painful choice, and I can't stop thinking about it. She has dogs she loves dearly, but the man she's dating is allergic. Not "a little sneezy," but truly can't be around them. She feels like she's being asked to choose between her pets and a relationship that could become something real. I keep thinking about an associate of mine from a local board. She was in a serious, loving relationship with a man who was kind, gracious and clearly devoted to her. The

Dear Annie: My husband and I recently moved to a new town, and I feel lonelier than I expected to feel at this stage of life. We are new empty nesters. Our youngest left for college in the fall, and not long after that we relocated for my husband's job. On paper, it made sense. It is a nice area, safe, pretty and full of things people say they love. But most days I feel like I am walking around in someone else's life. Back home, I knew who I was. I had my routines, my friends, my familiar grocer