Bullying is nothing new, and neither is the recent surge in school violence a new global phenomenon. Ours is an educational system that generates a vicious circle of ruthless competition and for those left behind, well, there’s either one of two choices: succumb to failure or lash out at the powers that be.
In the case of the former, who often become victims of bullying, it is easy to feel overwhelmed by a perceived sense of helplessness and worthlessness. These poor souls feel as if they have nobody to talk to about their problems, and what can suicide be but a resounding echo of a victim’s desperate cry for help? But in a society which devalues weakness like a stock commodity and crushes the spirit of open-ended communication like a smashing comet, why should anyone care?
On the other hand, we have the latter group, the bullies who are characterized by their brazen acts of violence and appalling degrees of disregard for others. These so-called “juvenile delinquents” are often cited as the main cause of the problem, as if sending them to a “special school” or wiping them off the face of the earth would suddenly eradicate the problem of teenage suicides and bullying. What many people fail to realize is that the bullies are also the victims of a system that undermines basic human values by breeding resentment, hostility, and outright indignation among students who are shunted aside. Isn’t it perfectly normal that a cornered animal viciously fight back to protect its life and its dignity?
Having been on both ends of the spectrum, I can perfectly understand the mindset of both the victim and the bully. As one of only several Asian-Americans attending a predominantly white elementary school in America, I know firsthand the unbearable humiliation of being labeled a “loner” and being the constant target of demeaning racial slurs. Conversely, I also know what it is like to put a knife to another student’s throat to demand money or to commit vicious assaults against innocent people.
Now, at the age of 32, I am old enough to realize that I can fault neither my parents nor the circumstances in which I grew up. It does, however, disturb me that the unprecedented rise in school and gang violence that I witnessed in America in the 1990s has now come home to roost in Korea. I applaud the efforts of the government and public campaigns aimed at aggressively addressing and uprooting bullying. Nonetheless, I have to wonder whether such efforts are being exerted only to appease the public outcry over the recent spate of suicides or whether true lasting changes are in the making.
What I do know is that it’s time to start treating our children and our students ― the victims, the bullies, and all students alike ― like people with real human feelings of compassion, dignity, respect, and integrity. We must seek to understand and empathize rather than just condemn and criticize. We must attempt to look at the value of a student’s life not based on superficial test scores but on a student’s personality and inner worth. We owe it to ourselves, and most importantly, we owe it to our children and future generations, to do at least that much.
By Jun Kim
Jun Kim is an English teacher at a private English language academy in Seoul. ― Ed.
