Published : Aug. 28, 2012 - 20:01
Last November the body of a mother murdered months earlier by her high school son was discovered. The body had been sealed in the bedroom of their apartment for eight months.
The initial shock at the discovery was soon replaced by controversy over the abusive treatment the son had endured at the hands of his dead mother, an abuse that stemmed from her obsession over his student rank. Police investigation and testimony at trial revealed extensive abuse involving a seven iron and a resultant paralyzing fear that the young man had towards his mother that led to her murder in a heated moment.
Considering the extent of the abuse and in recognition of its extreme nature, the trial court in March of this year sentenced the young man to three years and six months. While this outcome appeared equitable in light of the extenuating circumstances, not everyone in the court that day was happy with the result. Thus the prosecutor appealed the case to the Seoul high court and last week had a second chance at arguing for stronger punishment.
The prosecutor’s argument in both courts rested on the concept that the actions of the mother in disciplining her son were not exceptional in South Korea and did not directly lead to the murder. He argued that the mother was merely strict and concerned for her son’s future and no more to be blamed than any other South Korean mother. Further, and despite the overwhelming physical and testimonial evidence, the prosecutor flatly stated he did not believe the young man was beaten over 200 times. He opined that such treatment would have killed the young man years ago. The young man’s reply was emotional and heart wrenching as he offered himself up to the prosecutor for the same abusive treatment to prove he could survive.
While the attitude of the prosecutor appears outrageous, the fact is that in South Korea harsh treatment of children is commonplace and it is the norms of South Korean child rearing that permit the kind of ignorance demonstrated by the prosecutor to continue unabated. The idea that a mother could repeatedly beat her child with a golf club and be considered normal comes from the fact that child abuse still occurs here on a daily basis while those around turn their heads and ignore it.
In South Korea, one often sees mothers slapping their children’s faces while shouting, “Do it the right way!” A child who brings home poor grades can expect to be forced to study every night with little or no sleep until those grades improve. And the Korean practice of “hoechori,” a stick that is solely for hitting children, is indicative of the poor understanding of the consequences of child abuse.
In response to this critique, many in South Korea point to the results of such extreme methods. The high achievements on international tests and the high rate of university graduation are extolled while the methods that lead to such ends are excused.
A murder as a result of such treatment is considered a rare and unfortunate occurrence especially when millions of elementary through high school students are abused by their mothers in similar ways and still go on to lead seemingly normal lives. But forgotten is the fact that child abuse has long lasting and detrimental effects, effects that can easily be seen in South Korean society.
Primary among the long term effects of child abuse are alcoholism, depression and suicide, all areas in which South Korea ranks high in international indices. According to the World Health Organization, South Koreans drink over 50 percent more alcohol per person than the Japanese or Americans and have a concomitant higher rate of alcohol related diseases and disorders. Death due to liver cirrhosis is so high that more than three times as many people die in South Korea from this disorder than in Japan or America. Also well known is the South Korean suicide rate, which tops the OECD.
Finally recent surveys show that South Koreans are among the unhappiest people in the world. Young South Koreans overwhelmingly view South Korea as the unhappiest nation and, by a large majority, South Koreans of all ages view their country negatively. This is the only country surveyed where a majority of the people wished for their children to be born and raised in another country.
South Korea’s success at internationally standardized tests, the end that justifies the means of child abuse, is overrated. The fact is that South Korean children study twice as long as their Finnish counterparts but score the same.
Diligent study in South Korea comes overwhelmingly from the fear of being left behind and not from a desire to succeed. And in a country where over 80 percent of students graduate from university it is easy to see why they fear being outpaced. However, the sad result of so many graduates is that such degrees become the commonest currency of employment and no longer command respect.
Thus instead of focusing on tracking sex criminals and struggling to understand the psychology of knife attacks the mothers of South Korea should consider their own child rearing methods and question whether such abusive tactics truly lead to success. Perhaps instead of continuing to exhort their children to “do it the right way,” South Korean mothers should look to the example of K-pop star Psy who told the New York Times that his success has been because he has done it not the right way.
The court decision on the fate of the young man will come down next week. Let’s hope that the high court follows the wise decision of the lower court and considers the circumstances of South Korean child rearing in rendering its verdict.
By Daniel Fiedler
Daniel Fiedler is a professor of law at Wonkwang University. He also holds an honorary position as the lawyer representative for international marriages in Namwon, North Jeolla Province. ― Ed.