In spite of government effort, many working men and women still struggle to juggle it allEvent planner and publicist Kim Su-min loves her job, which involves organizing an upcoming science-themed international event in South Jeolla Province. Her office is in Seoul, but she doesn’t mind the long commute almost every day ― in spite of the fact that she is nine-months pregnant and works 12 hours a day.
“I love my job ― I just can’t see myself being a housewife,” Kim told The Korea Herald.
“But it’s certainly hard to balance family and work. I rarely get to see my husband. And I don’t even want to imagine how my life will be once the baby is born ― it’s very likely that I’d lose my sanity. I already feel guilty for my unborn baby; I don’t think I’ll have enough time for him. But I’d like to continue my work.”
Kim is one of many Korean working men and women who struggle balancing work and family. According to a 2010 survey by the Ministry of Gender Equality and Family, 53.6 percent of full-time workers who wished to turn to part-time jobs said they need more time to spend with their family and children.
How do you achieve a happy equilibrium between career and family?
By finding your balance, according to Park Eun-kyung, director of Korea Coach Association and CEO of Balance Happiness Coaching.
“It starts with finding out who you are and what you like. Once you discover that, you will begin to see your life priorities. You’ll realize whether you’d have to work a lot, or work less, or even work at all to be the person you want to be,” she said.
In terms of spending time with family and children, Park stressed that it’s “quality over quantity.”
“Being a full-time mom doesn’t guarantee your child’s happiness,” said Park.
“And just because you cannot spend a lot of time with your children, it doesn’t mean that you cannot form a loving relationship with them. It’s totally possible to let them know that you care by a simple phone call or a text message.
“But there will be moments when your children will make specific requests ― such as ‘I really need you to be there for me tomorrow,’ or ‘I really want to do this with you,’” she said. “Those are the requests that you should never ignore. You may not always be able to do what you are asked to do ― but you should at least show that you try your best to do what you can do for them, and that you take their requests seriously. That’s how you build trust.”
Suh Bock-sun, another life coach and director of Korea Coach Association, said it’s important to know that “you cannot have it all” when trying to balance family and work.
“First of all, know your wants and priorities,” Suh told The Korea Herald. “For example, if you really want to work and find it fulfilling, then you should do it ― even if your son or daughter is still a baby. But you have to make compromises. Be ready to spend your paycheck on day care and other forms of help that you need for your child. Make sure he or she is in good hands. Get good, reliable help so that you don’t have to worry about the baby at work. And as your child reaches an age where he or she needs less care, you’ll be making more money, too. You’ll have a solid career in the long-run.”
The government has been putting efforts to support people with their work-family balance as well. To promote a family-friendly work environment, the Gender Ministry has been recognizing public and private companies that encourage their employees to balance their work and family lives since 2008. Last year, a total of 95 companies received the accreditation ― including POSCO, Yuhan Kimberly Co., Korea Tourism Organization, Samsung Fire and Marine Insurance, and Korea Hydro & Nuclear Power Co., Ltd.
Yet male workers may not always be benefit from their “family-friendly” work places.
“My company certainly supports,” said an employee who works for one of the accredited companies and wanted to remain anonymous. He said he wasn’t aware of the accreditation of his company.
“There is a daycare center for our kids. Everyone gets off work early on Wednesdays, which is the designated ‘family day.’ But the problem is the workload. My job usually requires me to drink until two in the morning, almost everyday. I think those who really want to balance family and work must be super strong physically.”
Yang In-sook, a research fellow at the state-run Korean Women’s Development Institute, said the primary issue behind the work-family balance lies in working hours.
“What can an individual do about the whole family issue, really, if he or she can’t go home on time,” she told The Korea Herald. “The long working hours are also a contributing factor to the current unemployment rate. Work-family balance cannot be achieved without the solid regulations on the hours.”
Jo Lin from the Gender Ministry said the working hour policies must be met with practical measures to be enforced. “I don’t think the problem has to do with the lack of policies,” he said. “The policies are there. The issue is whether they can actually be put into practice in real work places.”
According to an OECD index based on data from 2010, South Korean workers have the longest working hours among the 34 member states. They work 2,256 hours a year, much higher than the OECD average of 1,739.
By Claire Lee (
dyc@heraldcorp.com)